5 Years of German

JS - TRUE STORY: One Sunday morning, a distinguished looking couple from Germany came to our Church. In greeting and chatting with them after the service I made a very big mistake. I told them that I studied German for five years in High School.

In their lovely thick German accents they said, “oh how nice. Please tell us something in our German language.”

I said, “oh no, its been so many years since I studied German and I have forgotten most of what I have learnt. All I can remember now are little phrases that are quite useless.”

“No, please, Pastor John,” the lady said with an eager smile, “we have been away from Germany for 3 weeks and have not heard any German at all – please, Pastor John, tell us – please tell us something in German.”

I was more than a little suprised with their insistence. They seemed very determined for me to say something in their language.

“O.K., here’s something I remember” I said, “but I do warn you, it is not a very useful phrase.”

“We don’t mind,” the husband said, “just tell us something in German.”

O.K., I said, “Ich kannst nicht ins kino gehen aber ich bin nur dreizein jahre alt.”

The German couple looked completely stunned for a brief moment. Then they looked at each other. One started smiling, the other started laughing, and then they both started laughing in unison, to such an extent that their laughter became loud.

Others in the room stopped their own conversations and began turning around to find out where the big noise was coming from.. and as they looked, they saw this visiting German couple holding each other up as they were almost falling down because their laughter was so pronounced.

Amidst their gasping for air, the husband said, “You are right, that is totally .. ridiculous..” as he tried to breathe through the laugher again… “We thought you would quote a Scripture or have at least something profound to say, but that was one of the funniest things I’ve ever heard…”

Why would they be laughing so much?

Well, in their imagination, they could see me in Germany, perhaps in one of the big cities.. perhaps I was driving a car and it broke down and I needed help.. finding someone on the sidewalk I rush up to them and say:

“I CANNOT GO TO THE MOVIES BECAUSE I AM ONLY THIRTEEN YEARS OLD!”